Brave(ish)

Italia!

Margaret Ghielmetti — Sat, 18 Apr 2020 15:55:16 +0000

Italia! I fell in love with the Bel Paese as a twenty-one-year-old backpacker staying in pensioni recommended by Let’s Go: Europe. Sure, it helped that I met a handsome Roman boy first thing (now a good friend to my husband and me.) Certo, I was astonished by the art and architecture, the landscapes and cityscapes. But what blew my mind then (and still does when I have the luck to return) is the Italian way of life. My Anglo-Saxon upbringing compels me to rush all the time but – in Italy – I slow way down: indulging in a mid-day granita and brioche at a Sicilian café; drinking more deep, dark espresso than maybe I should; nibbling Venetian cicchetti snacks at a standing room-only bar; reveling in the particular golden light that falls on Italy. Exchanging my power-walk stride for the passeggiata at dusk, when elegantly coiffed, dressed and shod Italians stroll cobblestoned streets at a leisurely pace (no way am I exchanging my walking shoes for stilettos, however.) Now, when none of us can actually voyage to places we love, I’m grateful to armchair-travel through books, movies, and even videos of Italians singing to one another out their windows! In these dark times, l’arte di vivere reminds me to live each day as artfully as I can.

The F Words

Margaret Ghielmetti — Sat, 18 Apr 2020 15:51:46 +0000

Every day, I pray for help on many things. “Please help me to set goals for my life and take steps to achieve them.” These goals include exploring, loving, and sharing the world through my art. Next I pray, “Please help me to set goals for my day.” To help me remember this daily-prayer list, I use an “F” sound: Faith, my Feller, Friends and Family, Physical, [healthy-ish] Food, Finance, Fierce [which is the name of my solo show and my code word for my creative expression.] Fun is, alas, always last on my list: I get to it only once I’ve attended to all the others (and my chores to boot.) While I was raised that non-stop productivity is essential, I just don’t buy it anymore. Sure, I still seriously love to get s**t done. But I’m determined to skootch Fun a bit higher on my list, even during these scary and stressful times. Once it’s possible again, I want to get back to improv and live storytelling and being with people I love for shared meals and conversation. First step towards fun, I figure, will be acquiring an inflatable unicorn with a golden horn. I know you want one, too . . .

Patrick and Margaret

Margaret Ghielmetti — Sat, 18 Apr 2020 15:46:59 +0000

My parents had been married for sixty-six years by the time my mom died. She loved to tell me that she would never divorce my father. “One day, though,” she’d add. “I will kill him.” (She’d be holding a frying pan over my poor dad’s bald head when she said that, but she did not orchestrate his demise.) Patrick and I have been hitched for “only” twenty-eight years. We’ve endured some heartbreak, especially my infertility. We’ve moved around the world, living on four continents, which had its moments of glamour but also of bewilderment. We’ve experienced disappointment like every human I know. We do believe that partnerships take work and we believe in “doing the work.” That’s included recognizing the pattern we jump into at the least provocation. Once our particular marital dance music starts, we’re no longer really in the room as conscious adults: our avatars have taken over. One of us mopes and the other storms angrily out of the room (c’est moi.) Over the years, we’ve learned that things will get better between us if we hit “pause,” agree to re-address the issue later, and remind ourselves that we’re in this together (although we may hate one another in the moment.) The sun will come out again – if we hang in there (and gently set down the frying pan.)

Memoir in a Year

Margaret Ghielmetti — Mon, 30 Mar 2020 17:24:49 +0000

So what’s the key to writing a memoir in a year? For me, it helped that I’d long been writing Trip Reports from everywhere we lived around the world: Europe, Asia, Africa, the US. (That’s a lotta three-ring binders o’ stuff to draw from.) It helped that I took “Memoir in a Year” at Chicago’s StoryStudio: I learned so much from our instructor and my fellow memoirists. It helped that I was able to hire top-notch development editors. It helped that I have a smart, engaged writers group plus friends ready to train their eagle eyes on my manuscript. Most of all, though, I gotta tell ya, it was a matter of getting my butt in chair and keeping it there. My butt is sore from sitting for hours writing, editing, researching, revising, word-nerding, and proofreading. That’s OK: it’s my butt and it’s my book! I’ve dreamt of achieving this goal since I was a little girl, but – for decades – I was too busy living others’ lives for them to follow my dream. But in 2019, I put the key in the lock, I turned the key, and now I’m delighted to say that my book baby will be born on September 15, 2020!